??

[rispacooper]

In an interesting and not entirely purely theoretical way, one is wondering whether or not it is possible for, shall we say, the complicated types and the normies to get along?

And by one I mean me.

And I don't mean the good and the bad or anything all Cool and Epic in any super romantic story lines about love leading to redemption or anything like that, though those are some tasty fantasy goodness. I mean like...those with difficult backgrounds, those who are unconventional in thought or act, the creative types and the weirdos, being around on a regular basis with...those with normal backgrounds.

And don't yell about me for saying "normal". I mean it in the way that Christopher Titus uses it, those with backgrounds classified as "dysfunctional" versus those who had the usual childhood traumas but nothing too shocking. Or those who've had to deal with real shit. Or just with incredibly odd and unusual thought patterns. That sort of thing.

Does hanging around with those who have yet to experience that level of crap, or those who just have no concept of anything other than what they know, however nice it may be, is it like a relief? Is it fun? Is it frustrating and/or infuriating?

Considering the "dysfunctional" types (who usually function just fine, actually) are SO not the majority and yet must exist and work and live in this world, they have obviously dealt with this issue. (Though a large portion do seem to live separately, in glorious little enclaves. And the number of innovations and works of art that have come out of those really sort of tell me that the normal people can go suck it, but that's another issue for another day).

Breaking it all down and from what I've seen, the weirdos of the world do make an effort to get along. This implies that something is gained from these social transactions, even if it's only something as basic as job security.

So what is it?

*addition*: not to say that genius and artistry can't appear out of the whitest of bland-ass suburbs either. genius is genius, it appears whenever, wherever.

Comments

[dlasta.livejournal.com]

Hope you don't mind me commenting out of the blue like this.:)

is it like a relief? Is it fun? Is it frustrating and/or infuriating?

Mostly it's like wearing a mask of being ordinary(?).
Like you're supposed to curb the sharp edges for the sake of not making people sad or threatened. I, personally, get stressed when forced to spend much time with people who can't handle me without the normal!filter. (A week with my grandma, whom I love but can't be myself with, makes me sleep for two days after.)

Experience has taught me to lie when necessary (to not make people fall over themselves to be sad for me) and not use too many 'weird' words as to not come off like I'm flaunting my 'intelligence'. And honestly, I'm not all that smart, I just like to read and know things.

...Why yes, a pity party for one.:D

Um, what I actually mean is: it's easy to get along if you keep your behavior withing the limits of the specific group you're in at the time.
Avoid certain subjects, don't come off too strong even if you disagree, absolutely do not let anybody know if there are any skeletons in your closed (trauma wise) and talk what they're talking about, if possible. The real stuff can be left for the people who won't start crying when you mention off offhandedly that you're orphan/whatever or talk behind your back that you're just using those special words to look smarter.

Dammit, this sounds like this is a big deal and it's not. People like other people who are like them. And work mates and for work and not for bonding and shit. I just don't like lying or not saying what I really mean. Also, I don't get it why people get so damn upset for somethings that happened to me and that I'm completely fine with, now. It feels selfish and weird. Like, please, do go and bogart my trauma since I'm not doing anything with it.

Ps. I feel the need to point out that despite the text above, I'm not a special snowflake. Just on occasion very annoyed with people.:D

(Also, what's the back story for this post? Inquiring minds want to know.)

[rispacooper.livejournal.com]

Mostly it's like wearing a mask of being ordinary(?).
Like you're supposed to curb the sharp edges for the sake of not making people sad or threatened. I, personally, get stressed when forced to spend much time with people who can't handle me without the normal!filter. (A week with my grandma, whom I love but can't be myself with, makes me sleep for two days after.)

Ah yes, the being around others exhaustion. I completely understand. It makes work into like...twice as much work.

No I'm not blaming them (the uh...normies) I was just wondering basically, I guess, that if they don't do this, how can they ever relate? And if us freakazoid types don't ever let them see the real us, then they never will.
But mainly...if they don't build up facades or walls beyond things like the normal professional face needed for work, do they even get that the person they're talking to is completely different from how they act at work?

And why? Cuz a normie asked me out, and everyone is telling me to try it (which is reasonable I suppose) except that I don't see much point considering he asked out a person who isn't really me (and also I'm not especially attracted to him).

[dlasta.livejournal.com]

if they don't build up facades or walls beyond things like the normal professional face needed for work, do they even get that the person they're talking to is completely different from how they act at work?

To my experience no, some people really don't get the work persona thing.
Or the 'I don't know you that well yet' thing. :D
I get a ridiculous amount of disbelief way, way too often. It's not that I'm lying or that the person I'm at work and other places is false but that it's not all that there is. (Tho, I have to say that I am somewhat private person.)
Oh, my personal favorite of those surprised exclamations if from years ago when I offhandedly mentioned my marital status and got 'Oh, I didn't know you liked men!'. (This wasn't a dig at my appearance but she'd made this assumption based on the fact that I hadn't talked about men/etc. with her. And because I was feminist and everything. :)

...Now I'm thinking it might not be a 'normie' thing but just some people being kinda stupid. :D

(and also I'm not especially attracted to him)

Hmm, if he's not in any way interesting why bother?
Is he interesting?

[rispacooper.livejournal.com]

I don't know. I guess. Meh.

Then there was a whole (imho) wussing out incident in which he couldn't handle the barrage of crap and degrading treatment that is retail, which I deal with every damn day, and honestly, that's mil compared to some of the shit life throws at you, so, yeah, he's not scoring so high.

[dlasta.livejournal.com]

I think Meh says it all.